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Thursday, September 19, 2013

Feeling frustrated....and sore.

On tuesday, in a fit of "I need to get my ass in gear", I threw on Jillian.Michales 30 Day.Shred, and proceeded to sweat and curse my way through level 1. I forgot just how hard that video can be when you're as out of shape as I've gotten.

Mostly, my issue was (as it's always been) with upper body strength, or lack there of. I can do squats for hours, but make me raise my arms above my head and three sets in I'm shaking.

I'm still sore from this two days later. This also resulted in me slipping my 100 push up and 200 sit up challenge days by one, so that instead of doing them yesterday, I will be doing them today.

It also resulted in me eating way more than I should have last night. I didn't go over my points for the week, but I certainly ate into them (pun intended.) Which doesn't leave me my usual breathing room for the weekend. Maybe I can do some extra exercise and gain myself a few exercise points to trade in when we head over my parents this weekend.

My goals this week were to fit in one run, stick to my points, go to yoga, and to do the challenges. So far, I'm not doing so hot on those goals. If I can fit a run in and finish out the two more days on the challenges by the end of the week, I'll feel better about this week.

Honestly, like I've said before,  I want to get back to the point where I'm working out more days than not. I want to get myself back to the dojo, and before I do that, I want to be able to keep up with the push up and sit ups I'm supposed to be doing (hence the challenges.)

In the back of my mind, since I first heard my brother was thinking of proposing, is the fact that I will be going to his wedding. And like it or not, I will be photographed in a dress, and I will have to see those photographs, and lots of people will see them. I do not want to look awful in those pictures. Even though they haven't set a date yet, I can feel that phantom deadline looming. It terrifies me, because I have been so unsuccessful at loosing the "baby weight" so far.  And further back, I was unsuccessful at loosing weight before my own wedding.

The last time I was able to loose a significant amount of weight was back in NYC, when I was unemployed, but had the disposable income to afford a gym membership, healthy food, and new gear. I had the free time to make exercise my job, doing at least a half hour of some exercise a day, but more often doing two half hour sessions, usually one yoga session and one gym session (which to be honest was half an hour of running, and then half an hour of stretching/strength, followed by 10 minute walks to the subway and then from the subway home.) Not to mention just living in NYC was a more active life style. There was so much more walking.  Now, if I'm not careful, I can go an entire day where the most exercise I get is walking up the stairs in my house.

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