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Wednesday, May 13, 2015

And it all crashes down in an instant

I figured that I had been doing fairly well with the exercise and eating since New Years. Yeah, I had kinda slacked a bit lately on the nutrition, focusing more on finishing the Half, but I figured all the running was making up for it.

I haven't stepped on a scale in a long time, but I was feeling good about my progress and the direction I was heading.

And then last night, my Mother In Law took a picture at an outdoor concert and tagged me in it. My phone pinged and I clicked on the notification and saw the picture.


A super cute picture of the Hubs and the Munchkin. Adorbs. No wonder everyone I knew was liking the picture. But then I saw why I was tagged.

And all I could see was this:


And I wanted nothing more than to be able to erase the picture from the internet. From existence. Each ping I got when someone liked the photo stabbed into me a little bit.

And then I stepped on the scale. 180. UP almost 10 lbs from the last time I'd stood on the scale. I felt awful, humiliated, defeated. All this running, all this time, and I am back again close to my heaviest weight, and worse, I look it.

So I'm starting over (again) today. The eating needs to be cleaned up. No more "oh just this ones" or "I can let it slide today." And I need NEED to add in exercise besides running.

I feel so utterly awful right now.

3 comments:

  1. Oh Meg. Listen. I'm sure you are the only one who is looking at that lovely photo and flippin' out over your stomach. I know you are. I get it. It sucks to feel that way. But, you are awesome and lovely and fantastic and a single photo doesn't show who you really are. Promise.

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  2. The one thing that I have learned through all of my marathon and half ironman training is that you can't out train a bad diet. You just can't do it. Sorry that it had to come to you in a such a jarring manner though. That's never fun :( If you have any interest, there is a group of us on facebook helping each other eat healthy and lose weight. Meg (above commenter) is in it, too! Just let me know if you want to join! Email me at onecrazypenguin @ gmail.com :)

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  3. We are our own worst critics. I think my blog is helping me get over some of my photo-phobia though. And yes, the picture is adorable....who could possibly see anything other than the complete joy of a father and daughter...you are a lucky lady :)

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